A life of frustration is inevitable for any coach whose main enjoyment is winning. Chuck Noll
While there are many examples in life, March Madness provides more than enough stories. If you have watched any of the 67 game, single-elimination NCAA basketball tournament you’ll see the frustration.
Whether you watch individual players (seniors, in particular) … teams (Cinderella or not) or the coaches, there will only be one crowned the 2012 NCAA Champions.
Indeed, there will always be commemorative merchandise shipped overseas where it doesn’t matter what the clothing says (the name of the team that didn’t win); it’s a new shirt.
What’s going on?
There’s a lot of frustration these days, have you noticed?
When was the last time you felt frustrated? What was going on in the Story?
Frustration can be defined as a deep chronic sense or state of insecurity and dissatisfaction arising from unresolved problems or unfulfilled needs.
We experience frustration when hindered or defeated in an undertaking, when something brings on feelings of discouragement or our efforts seem to have no effect.
No wonder it is so frustrating to be frustrated.
However, feeling frustrated is actually a call to pay attention.
Generally speaking, frustration is associated with an unmet need, unfulfilled desire or a blocked goal; forward motion is limited.
What’s stopping you?
Where are you experiencing frustration? Which goal, need, or desire is being obstructed, unmet, unresolved? Where is your forward motion stalled out? What’s the message in the Story; what’s really going on?
One ancient Hebrew proverb says it well: The wisdom of the prudent is to give thought to their ways, but the folly of fools is deception.
As you give thought to your frustration, perhaps these questions will help you listen for truth in the Story …
- Why do I feel insecure or unsure of myself in this situation?
- What is the source of my disappointment or dissatisfaction?
- What is the unresolved problem?
- What is the unfulfilled need?
- What expectation is unmet?
How will you move forward?
When the path to achieving a goal, meeting a need, or fulfilling a desire is blocked frustration can be a reality-check. To be productive, we must examine the reason for frustration, all while accepting personal responsibility to move forward.
By default, there are two responses: hostility or withdrawal (yes, “fight or flight”). The third option requires self awareness, openness to truth, and a commitment to engage in seeking solution.
How well do you stay engaged? The answer will determine both the level of frustration and effective problem solving in order to keep moving forward?
Frustration makes it easy to become stuck whether in a relationship or the pursuit of worthwhile goals. To move forward requires encouragement; courage to confront the “brutal facts” and strength that comes from meaningful purpose.
Encouragement raises confidence and the capacity to press through resistance, whether internal or external. In other words, high frustration requires encouragement if we are to stay engaged in the journey.
We need each other.
Frustration requires both outside support and a personal commitment to leadership development. When you combine your ability and willingness to learn and change you can overcome the obstacles life brings.
Where are you experiencing frustration?
Where do find encouragement?
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