It arrived in the morning mail. Stamped on the envelope:
“It doesn’t cost much to leave it all behind.”
Jim Berra’s letter addressed one of my life challenges: finding the perfect vacation. Jim offered an alternative — ditch the stress and head straight for fun. To further help me out, he suggested an easy and value-driven action step:
“Book now … save up to 20%.”
You guessed it, a Caribbean cruise.
“It doesn’t cost much to leave it all behind.”
How does this relate to your growth as a leader?
What could you “leave behind”?
One of the coaching exercises I adapted from Marshall Goldsmith is a list of 21 common challenges leaders face in interpersonal and leadership behavior. The assignment is to identify the top three from the list.
Often, leadership development is about gaining new skills. Sure, that is part of it. But maturity as a leader is not always about what you must start doing. Sometimes the solution is to stop an unproductive behavior.
For example, one of the 21 limiting behaviors is “Winning too much.” addresses the drive to win at all costs and in all situations — whether it matters or not.
Not you? How about this one: “Claiming credit that you don’t deserve.” Here, the behavior is to overestimate your contribution and steal the credit due others.
Here’s good news: it doesn’t cost much to leave these limiting behaviors behind.
What’s that costing you?
While the cruise invitation suggests it doesn’t cost much to leave it all behind, there is a cost.
The first step in stopping a leadership-limiting, interpersonal behavior is to notice. Being mindful of how you show up and seeking feedback allows you connect the dots. Reflection requires you to create space – to have a time and place to listen to your Story and process your observations. The discipline of keeping a journal is helpful.
With increased awareness and honesty, it’s important to tap into your support system for accountability. To add a reminder and make a decision to stop.
What if you stop and think?
Consider the ripple effects:
- Others will appreciate your honesty
- Your vulnerability will develop trust
- Build trust and grow respect
- Trust is critical to team success
The cost of growth versus the cost of ignoring limiting behavior indicates “it doesn’t cost much to leave it all behind.”
Create Space for reflection
What core “people-skill” might limit your influence?
What does that unproductive behavior cost you?
How might you go about changing this behavior?
Here’s to your voyage,
Steve
Note: The original version of this post is published as Chapter 20 in The People Project: Your Guide for Changing Behavior and Growing Your Influence as a Leader.
Image: Steve Laswell